During 2000-2003 I had the opportunity to visit and study in and around Kyoto, Japan on three occasions. Kyoto is a cultural jewel for Japan with 17 World Heritage sites, 1600 Buddhist temples and 100’s of majestic Japanese Gardens. In studying the history and culture of these Gardens I was able to view many from inside Temples. In passing through the hallways I could hear the chants, see monks, smell incense and from a distance see the seated meditation.
On my last visit I was curious about this meditation in the temples and asked to go to a Zen Centre for a few days. Somehow I found myself at the Hosen-Ji Zen Centre nestled in the mountains and countryside near Arashiyama, outside of Kyoto. Having no experience with meditation I thought I was going to a relaxing retreat or an onsen - maybe if I was lucky it might have a spa attached. In reality I was sitting for long periods of seated meditation, silent eating and monks walking behind me with sticks! I had no idea what was happening or what was coming next and no one could tell me in English. The most unexpected event occurred as we headed out for one our work periods. I was hoping it would be something simple such as working in the garden! But I was sent to the streets with the group asking for support for the Zen Center. I don’t think anyone could tell I was a foreigner with my loose fitting outfit, conical straw hat, bell, uncomfortable thong shoes and a pocket for money. We shuffled through the streets, ringing bells, chanting and the people of the community came out to give us food, money, encouragement and respect. I think my favorite moment was finally getting a chance to sit down and rest my feet, eating donated fresh fruit in an empty outdoor sumo wrestling venue (yes really)! I left the Hosen-Ji Zen Centre feeling a sense of wonder, freedom, curiosity and most of all just a little bit of contentment.
Back to reality in Victoria with no more trips scheduled to Japan, I was searching again. I was divorced with two children and confused. I started to build my life again and searched out the Victoria Zen Centre and Eshu. I had so many questions about what I experienced in Japan and how I could continue to learn. But I had interruptions and curiosities of other centers and techniques. My children continued to take up my time; I developed a business in Horticultural Therapy and I traveled to India on my own. I made many appearances at the Victoria Zen Centre (VZC) but was never able to commit to the practice and become a member. I took other detours with unsuccessful new relationships, physical fitness challenges and goals, an attempt at a new career completely unsuited to me and death. Finally, the realization that I had to get back to the Victoria Zen Centre - it was the only thing that made sense and there was always a sense of relief coming back and a wonderful acceptance.
I thank Ven. Eshu, Doshu and VZC members for their gentle encouragements along the way. It has been a long journey from my first initiation at Hosen-Ji Zen Center in Japan to finally becoming a member at the VZC. But really it is only the beginning. I leave you with this inscription from the Daisen-in Temple and Garden in Kyoto.
Each day in life is training
Training for myself
Though failure is possible
Living each moment
Equal to anything
Ready for anything
I am alive – I am this moment
My future is here and now
For if I cannot endure today
When and where will I
(words for each day) – Soen Ozeku
**the image above is of a phoenix at Byodoin Temple
Hi Kathleen,
ReplyDeleteWhat a fantastic trip to Kyoto. That zendo experience sounds daunting. Have you seen the movie Enlightenment Guaranteed? Two brothers with no Japanese language skills end up in a zendo near Tokyo. You might like it.